I am not one to eat pizza, per se, but I love that this is out there because whenever I tell someone I’m vegan, they always assume I can’t eat anything but fruits and veggies. It gets so tiresome to have to rattle off the possibilities. We CAN eat PIZZA bitchesssss.
I don’t often talk about my recovery. More often than not, I’m recording the exercise for the day or what food I’ve eaten. But I’d like to take a moment to reflect on where I am, and some of the challenges I’m facing. The inner voice in unrelenting which makes progress rather difficult, but I manage to get by each day going through the motions with what I feel is positive (exercising and eating enough). My main difficulty is overcoming the rush of guilt that follows eating, whether it be an apple or a bowl of oatmeal, I can’t shake the feeling of shame. In the even that this could be triggering, I did not tag any eating disorder related terms, but even so, I hope this does not have a negative affect on anyone’s progress. I initially started this blog to find people like me, struggling, but it turned into something different. I thought it was better to stay completely positive, and to focus only on the fitness aspect of my daily routine. What I’ve come to realize, however, is that shoving this persistent voice under the rug is not doing myself any good. I am doing the best that I can, and I try to maintain a positive outlook, but at times I need to let my guard down and really allow for the raw emotions to come to the surface. Overcoming obstacles is not about ignoring them, but about facing them head-on with honesty and integrity. If I’m not honest with myself, I will never move forward in my life. Thanks to a wonderful support system, I no longer feel the need to hide beneath my inner struggles, but I still find it difficult to own up to my weaknesses as they stand. Hopefully, I can begin to let the wax coating of myself melt away and I will be free.
School has started for the semester, and I’m on track to having an active healthy school year! I’ve already worked out everyday, and have been eating salads and fruit. I’m excited for my last year of undergrad, and to continue getting more and more in shape. I may look into yoga again, although it is expensive. I’ve missed it this year, and I can’t wait to get back into it!!
I think I might be super strange, but when I get in the snacking mood, I pour a cup or so of frozen peas and crunch away. I am obsessed with them!! It’s a problem. But a great substitute to chips, or crackers. Way fewer calories, and much more nutritional value. And, it satisfies the feeling of just wanting something to chew on. It sounds weird, I know, but try it!
I find it interesting when people say, “I can’t lose weight because I love to eat.” Well, duh! Everyone loves to eat, it’s what keeps us alive! It’s natural to want to feed yourself, and you should never stop loving to eat (that’s where dangerous habits develop), you just have to train yourself to eat foods that will love you back! It’s like a bad relationship; no matter how much you love someone, it wont make any difference if they don’t love you back and treat you the way you should be. It’s just going to hurt you more in the end. Same thing with food: you may love Oreos and donuts, but what are they doing for you? Weight gain and clogged arteries. Not a healthy relationship.
Fall in love with foods that will love you back. Foods that will sustain you throughout the day, give you energy to be active and happy, and provide the nutrients that promote long term wellness. It may be difficult to kick that ice cream habit at first, but after you start maintaining a healthy diet, your body starts craving those healthy foods. It’s true! Naturally your body craves fruit sugars, not processed, and healthy fat, not trans fat. So once you flush out the bad, you’re going to start craving the good. That’s not to say that you’re never going to want ice cream again (let’s be real people). But you’re going to start reaching for that juicy peach when your sweet tooth starts acting up, and maybe the ice cream once a week! (Also, there’s a lot to be said for which type of ice cream you choose. Try coconut/almond milk ice cream, with natural ingredients).
So try it out! Stock your fridge with beautiful produce and veggies and find new exciting recipes! Believe me, the process worked for me!
I’ve been out of an internet connection for a little while, and so I wasn’t able to update, but my work outs have been so good since I last wrote!
Finals ended, and summer began, hence the workouts have begun as well. I usually go into turbo mode in the summertime, and from the looks of it, this summer will be no different. The past few days have been busy with moving out of my dorm and temporarily moving in with my boyfriend until my lease begins.
Monday I went to the gym, ran four miles and lifted. Then I had work for three hours which involves standing the whole time, and lifting heavy mats (so I’m burning calories). Then, when I got home, I went with my boyfriend to a stadium where we ran the stairs. I’m still incredibly sore from the stair work out today, and we plan to do it three times a week! It’s a really good ab work out on top of legs and butt!
Tuesday I went to the gym, only ran three miles because I was wayy sore, but then did a good weights work out. I had work again Tuesday.
Wednesday I went to the gym in the morning, ran three miles again (low mileage I know!!) and then did a super hard work out that my boyfriend set up for me (I think it’s called the 300 work out or the spartacus work out or something like that) and now I’m super sore from that too. After the gym, we took it outside and played some soccer in the sunshine which was really fun. Then I went to work again. I broke a sweat!
Today, I woke up and went to the gym, ran four miles (I’m wayy sore so running has been rough this week) and then did some weights. I plan to play some more soccer with my boyfriend when he gets off work. No work for me today :)
For food, I’ve been having cucumbers, green apples, a few strawberries and some peanut butter on one piece of bread. I may have some pasta tonight (just a little!) with homemade sauce that’s very low cal. (Simmer tomatoes with some fresh garlic, add a little water, lightly salt. When it turn into a sauce, add in some fresh pesto—no cheese or oil in the pesto— and stir. Delicious combination of flavors!) I try to make the veggies and fruits the main mass of my meal, and then add in a little something like a piece of toast or a little bit of pasta or oatmeal.
That’s all for now!
Yesterday I had a short work out, a three mile run and a little bit of weights. Two days before I ran five miles and killed it in the weight room. The day in between I had to work and didn’t have time to fit the gym in between finals. But my work is a work out in and of itself! I’m standing the whole time, and moving equipment around while coaching. It’s really nice to feel like I need to sit down after work instead of being in an office all day getting restless. I’ve been eating a lot of salads, with tofu, sunflower seeds, cucumbers, tomatoes, carrots and sometimes chick peas. I’ve had some carrots, apples, and pretzels for snacks the last few nights. My school started ordering these really good vegan cookies, so I’ve had a few of those but I need to break that habit! Maybe one a week or something like that is okay.. Yesterday I spent 8 hours in the library, and it looks like today will be similar (except that I have work in the middle of the day). Happy Wednesday!!